strange_doings (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
strange_doings) wrote2017-07-06 06:14 pm
strange_doings) wrote2017-07-06 06:14 pm
Cosplay Is/Is Not...
As with many things that inspire me to write, there was a post going around from someone on Facebook about how sad/angry they were about people's attitudes about cosplay, and while I could appreciate the reasoning behind the rant, it was based in so many misconceptions that I was moved to write a rebuttal. Before I do, however, let me say this up front: mocking or bullying anyone for any reason, over cosplay, is dumb and bad. Cosplay as a hobby is for everyone no matter who they are or where they come from, and everybody enjoys their cosplay differently. Every way is the right way to cosplay, unless it's being deliberately harmful or inflammatory to someone. Anyone who thinks they have a right to police who wears what needs to sit down and shut up.
The poor angry poster, however, made some rather mistaken claims. I don't know them, I don't even know which friend of a friend of a friend shared or reposted the post, so I don't know what happened to them to make them angry, who was bullied or why. Cosplay is not about accuracy, they said, or number of followers on facebook or other things, and cosplayers used to never bully each other over these superficial things.
Oh honey, have I got news for you.
I have been cosplaying (under whatever term for the practice was in vogue at the time) since 1999, and I consider myself still not as much of a veteran as people who've been wearing costumes at conventions since the 1960's and 70's. Whether hearing their stories or having my own experiences over the last 18 years, I can say with (chagrinned) confidence that yes, cosplayers have always bullied each other over stupid shit. The only difference between cosplay now and then is the actual websites whereupon said shenanigans occur.
If it wasn't racist bullshit or fat-shaming, which has always been a thing in cosplay, it was mocking people for making their own costume, mocking people for not making their own costume, saying you weren't a "real" costumer/cosplayer unless you did original designs, slut-shaming anyone who wanted to wear a revealing costume, demanding that you actually look like the actor if you wanted to do live-action, and let's not forget the never-ending screeching about crossplay. There was a time when men and women who wanted to dress as a character of the opposite gender were openly mocked and threatened, even if they weren't actually transgender. Then there was the time when it was assume everyone who crossplayed was transgender and why would you want to be a boy if you didn't feel like a boy. Now, it's pretty much taken as given that this is a thing people do and most of them aren't trans and most of them don't even care about passing. And I say this as a transman who has put a lot of effort into passing, both before and after transition.
It's what happens, in society as a whole as well as every microcosm of it, in subcultures and sub-subcultures from sports to school to motherfucking knitting forums. People need to feel a connection to their in-group, and the quickest, easiest means of doing so is identifying an "other" who is not part of the in-group and ostracizing them out of the group. In fandom, that has led to hierarchies wherein gatekeeping nerds are constantly playing a game of one-upsmanship, and always defining a new version of "that doesn't belong in our in-group so you need to leave." At times it can be even worse in a fandom-based situation because growing up, we were the out-group, the ones ostracized and driven out of normal society by the popular kids. So, even though we should know better, instead we double-down by exhibiting the same behavior to others as a means to feel empowered. It's a proven and documented social behavior. It takes strong people to break the cycle and stand firm against allowing that sort of behavior to permeate their social circle.
Step one is identifying the bad behavior, and that can be harder when people pull all sorts of toxic tricks to try to disguise themselves. It's not even deliberate, for some it's just an instinct to use sociopathic language, gaslighting, victim-blaming, and outright lying to make themselves look better and their determined rival or enemy worse. In cosplay, the toxic cosplayer may try to pass off their bullying as being for the victim's own good, such as, "I'm just telling you so that you don't get PMs telling you you're fat." They frame their bullying as critique. But critique isn't about tearing down the other person, it should be a means to point out where and how they can improve and even then, only if it's asked for. Critique is telling someone to hold up and check their wig in a mirror before letting the photographer snap the photo, because their wig is great and the photographer is great but after walking around all day you don't realize your wig slid back on your head. Critique is reminding them to snip their thread ends before wearing the costume for the first time. Critique is, when being asked "what could I have done better," feeling comfortable suggesting a different pattern, a couple of alternative fabric options, or even something as easy as looking at the costume under different lighting to make sure that red isn't too pink. Critique is asking whether they've thought about learning to work with a different material and then accepting the answer if they can't afford it or tried but couldn't get the hang of it. Being out and out cruel to people, either in public or in private, and judging them as inferior is not critique. For that matter, offering unsolicited advice is rarely warranted. Perhaps the cosplayer already knows that that's not the most flattering photo, but it's the only photo they got taken of that costume. Maybe they can't afford things like you can. Maybe they have medical issues or are colorblind. Maybe they're working three jobs just to stay afloat and don't have time to practice hand-embroidery. You don't know. Don't offer critique unless it's requested, and restrain yourself from making value judgments.
(TBC)
The poor angry poster, however, made some rather mistaken claims. I don't know them, I don't even know which friend of a friend of a friend shared or reposted the post, so I don't know what happened to them to make them angry, who was bullied or why. Cosplay is not about accuracy, they said, or number of followers on facebook or other things, and cosplayers used to never bully each other over these superficial things.
Oh honey, have I got news for you.
I have been cosplaying (under whatever term for the practice was in vogue at the time) since 1999, and I consider myself still not as much of a veteran as people who've been wearing costumes at conventions since the 1960's and 70's. Whether hearing their stories or having my own experiences over the last 18 years, I can say with (chagrinned) confidence that yes, cosplayers have always bullied each other over stupid shit. The only difference between cosplay now and then is the actual websites whereupon said shenanigans occur.
If it wasn't racist bullshit or fat-shaming, which has always been a thing in cosplay, it was mocking people for making their own costume, mocking people for not making their own costume, saying you weren't a "real" costumer/cosplayer unless you did original designs, slut-shaming anyone who wanted to wear a revealing costume, demanding that you actually look like the actor if you wanted to do live-action, and let's not forget the never-ending screeching about crossplay. There was a time when men and women who wanted to dress as a character of the opposite gender were openly mocked and threatened, even if they weren't actually transgender. Then there was the time when it was assume everyone who crossplayed was transgender and why would you want to be a boy if you didn't feel like a boy. Now, it's pretty much taken as given that this is a thing people do and most of them aren't trans and most of them don't even care about passing. And I say this as a transman who has put a lot of effort into passing, both before and after transition.
It's what happens, in society as a whole as well as every microcosm of it, in subcultures and sub-subcultures from sports to school to motherfucking knitting forums. People need to feel a connection to their in-group, and the quickest, easiest means of doing so is identifying an "other" who is not part of the in-group and ostracizing them out of the group. In fandom, that has led to hierarchies wherein gatekeeping nerds are constantly playing a game of one-upsmanship, and always defining a new version of "that doesn't belong in our in-group so you need to leave." At times it can be even worse in a fandom-based situation because growing up, we were the out-group, the ones ostracized and driven out of normal society by the popular kids. So, even though we should know better, instead we double-down by exhibiting the same behavior to others as a means to feel empowered. It's a proven and documented social behavior. It takes strong people to break the cycle and stand firm against allowing that sort of behavior to permeate their social circle.
Step one is identifying the bad behavior, and that can be harder when people pull all sorts of toxic tricks to try to disguise themselves. It's not even deliberate, for some it's just an instinct to use sociopathic language, gaslighting, victim-blaming, and outright lying to make themselves look better and their determined rival or enemy worse. In cosplay, the toxic cosplayer may try to pass off their bullying as being for the victim's own good, such as, "I'm just telling you so that you don't get PMs telling you you're fat." They frame their bullying as critique. But critique isn't about tearing down the other person, it should be a means to point out where and how they can improve and even then, only if it's asked for. Critique is telling someone to hold up and check their wig in a mirror before letting the photographer snap the photo, because their wig is great and the photographer is great but after walking around all day you don't realize your wig slid back on your head. Critique is reminding them to snip their thread ends before wearing the costume for the first time. Critique is, when being asked "what could I have done better," feeling comfortable suggesting a different pattern, a couple of alternative fabric options, or even something as easy as looking at the costume under different lighting to make sure that red isn't too pink. Critique is asking whether they've thought about learning to work with a different material and then accepting the answer if they can't afford it or tried but couldn't get the hang of it. Being out and out cruel to people, either in public or in private, and judging them as inferior is not critique. For that matter, offering unsolicited advice is rarely warranted. Perhaps the cosplayer already knows that that's not the most flattering photo, but it's the only photo they got taken of that costume. Maybe they can't afford things like you can. Maybe they have medical issues or are colorblind. Maybe they're working three jobs just to stay afloat and don't have time to practice hand-embroidery. You don't know. Don't offer critique unless it's requested, and restrain yourself from making value judgments.
(TBC)